BARBARA HAMBY
Ode on Arguing with Myself
with Comments by My Mother,
Hamlet, Philip Marlowe,
and My Mother-in-Law
Are you out of your mind?
Bitch, what’s your problem?
Can you believe you said that?
Do you want to burn in hell?
Exactly who do you think you are?
Fuck you and your little dog, too.
Go for it. You know you’ll tank.
Hell, who cares. We’re all drowning.
I mean, what’s the point?
Jail would be a paradise.
Keep at it, and you’ll end up in a black hole.
Let it go, Domino.
Make up your mind, if you have one.
No, nyet, non, niet, nada, nothing, rien,
Oh, you think you’re so smart, all evidence to the contrary.
Please, give me a minute to think.
Quiet, you’re driving me crazy.
Repeat after me, I will not smile. I will not smile.
Something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.
Turn yourself in, stupid.
Undercover operatives have stolen your mind.
Vamoose if you can, but the borders are closed.
What chance do you have?
Exit stage left.
Your pants are so tight I can see your religion.
Zup, girl—all you got is your doubt.
Are you out of your mind?
Bitch, what’s your problem?
Can you believe you said that?
Do you want to burn in hell?
Exactly who do you think you are?
Fuck you and your little dog, too.
Go for it. You know you’ll tank.
Hell, who cares. We’re all drowning.
I mean, what’s the point?
Jail would be a paradise.
Keep at it, and you’ll end up in a black hole.
Let it go, Domino.
Make up your mind, if you have one.
No, nyet, non, niet, nada, nothing, rien,
Oh, you think you’re so smart, all evidence to the contrary.
Please, give me a minute to think.
Quiet, you’re driving me crazy.
Repeat after me, I will not smile. I will not smile.
Something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.
Turn yourself in, stupid.
Undercover operatives have stolen your mind.
Vamoose if you can, but the borders are closed.
What chance do you have?
Exit stage left.
Your pants are so tight I can see your religion.
Zup, girl—all you got is your doubt.
Soul Ode